I found this on Yahoo’s eBay Finance Discussion Board and thought it was worth re-posting

SAN JOSE, Calif, 4/11/10 From staff reports

After years of decline and increasing apathy from buyers and sellers alike, Ebay Inc., the one time wunderkind of the tech world founded in the mid 1990′s, today filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy in the Superior Court for the Northern District of California.

CEO Heinrich Reich appeared at the courthouse with company attorneys, clutching a large black bag and wearing a grim expression. He refused to comment to reporters, though Pam Omidyar, her mascara smeared from tears, murmured to one reporter for a Silicon Valley business publication that a statement from the bunker-like fortress on Hamilton Avenue in San Jose would be forthcoming at 4 PM Pacific Time.

At that news conference, it is expected that ebay will announce that the site will be shuttered officially on April 17, at which time all auctions begun as late as today will have concluded. In a rare statement of concern for its customers, ebay spokeswoman Editha Braun said that it did not want the historical legacy of the once-mighty firm sullied by a messy and inconvenient last week of operations. In addition, she said that as a special courtesy and final thank you to buyers and sellers, she is freely announcing the usually hidden customer service toll free number (800-322-9266), and another very special private number to the executive suite, 408-376-7425.

As the company had been in steady decline since about 2001, the impact on the public and on ecommerce in general is expected to be muted. The stock was delisted in 2009, by which time faithful stockholders and pumpers had lost billions in share value. Former Reich leaders Bill “Obese Pre-Diabetic Slob Who Went to the Kellogg School”, Meg “The Pig” Whitman and John “Dumbo” Donahoe are now under investigation by the Securities and Exchange Commission and the FBI’s San Jose office for irregularities in the issuance and sale of shares from their personal portfolios. It is expected that an indictment of at least Meg Whitman could be announced at any time.

At a Starbucks on San Jose’s downtown Santa Clara Avenue, young coffee drinkers under 20 were not even familiar with the name of the company. An older customer, though, stated that he had used the website for over 8 years, before becoming disenchanted with arrogant management, a total lack of customer service, and poor to nonexistent sales on the site.

Barron’s, the financial newspaper, will feature a special “obituary” on the company in its forthcoming edition. A veteran Barron’s staff reporter, reached at his desk this morning, stated “it will be an impressive, thorough obituary and a thought-provoking article on what not to do in corporate America in the 21st century”. After apologizing and saying that he had to attend to urgent business elsewhere in the newsroom, the reporter chortled “I fully expect this sad story of arrogance, power, greed and sheer disdain for the customer will be made required reading in business schools around the nation and indeed, around the world, for decades to come”.